Strong is NOT the New Skinny

Driving into work today I saw an advertisement for a personal trainer. The tag line said “strong is the new skinny.” As soon as I read it, my blood started to boil.  As a therapist working in eating disorder recovery work, I couldn’t imagine a more wrong statement to be making.

We’ve taken exercise…something that should be about enjoyment, fun, caring for our bodies and placed another level of expectation and pressure on it.

So let’s think about what exercise is and is not.  It is NOT about the “should’s”—I should go longer, I should be better, I should be faster, I should look stronger. What is it about then? It IS about enjoyment, health, connection, and caring for your body.

There is a critical danger in placing all of these expectations on to something that is supposed to be about caring for our own body.  We’ve created a culture of perfectionism around exercise. It’s not enough to workout in a balanced way, we instead fall into traps of feeling that we should push more, do more, be more.  Strong does not mean that you have to look toned and perfect, strong does not mean that you push your body beyond its limits. You can be strong and imperfect, you can be strong and take breaks.

So instead of perfect exercise, let’s keep these questions in mind when approaching our next workout:

–       Is this caring for my body?

–       Is this what my body needs right now?

–       Does my body need rest?

–       How am I honoring my body?

Your body and your mind will thank you for the respect you’re showing it.

The post Strong is NOT the New Skinny appeared first on Live Well Therapy Associates | Narberth, PA.

source https://www.livewellassociates.com/strong-not-new-skinny/

Mindfulness Instead of Mindlessness

I recently made a post on social media about the flowers that had bloomed outside my house. Every day I walk in and out of my house at least 3 times, but usually even more than that. I’m carrying toddlers, or my workbags, or my mind is racing about the next thing I have to do.

One night as I was sitting out on the front step, I had a realization—there were huge flowers that had popped up all along the pathway. Gorgeous purple, white, green flowers that were lush and vibrant. I was shocked since I hadn’t noticed the plants growth at all.

I asked my husband when the plants had actually come up—last week he said. So I had been walking in and out of my house for about a week and a half and never noticed these big beautiful plants popping up and out of the ground!

I was so in my own head and my own worries that I had missed the flowers that popped up right in front of me.

It was then that I thought about how mindLESS I had been. Mindfulness is just the opposite of how I was acting. Mindfulness is the act of staying present, making a conscious decision to stay aware of what is happening in the moment. So often our anxieties, worries, or our to do lists take us away from what is currently in front of us and into worrisome places in the future.

Mindfulness helps us to not be at war with what we are thinking or feeling, but to more simply notice and pay attention to it. And the practice of mindfulness is clinically proven to reduce stress, anxiety and depression.

Here are 3 tips in order to begin practicing mindfulness in this very moment

1. Take In Your Surroundings: Sometimes it’s just that simple. Stop in this moment and take in the sights, the sounds, the colors and smells around you. Breathe them in. Is there something in your space that you haven’t noticed before? Something new and invigorating?

2. Place No Judgment On Your Thoughts: This is a more difficult tip. So often we fight with our own thoughts and feelings, believing that we “shouldn’t” be having them. Mindfulness invites us to look at ourselves from a different lens. There is no right or wrong to your feelings and thoughts. Yes, there is stress and sadness and hopeless feelings and these may be difficult, but if we fight with them we can intensify the feelings. Pay attention to the feeling, be aware, process and let it go.

3. Carve Out Time For Meditation: Many times people say that they’re not “good” at meditation but truthfully there is not a good or bad way to be in meditation. You’re only practicing being present and quiet in yourself. One of the simplest ways to begin this practice is to start small. Take just 5 minutes to sit, be still, and recenter. We like using an app for this if you’re just starting out; “Calm” is a great option which offers many different types and lengths of meditations. You can also focus your thoughts on a mantra, matching your breath to the phrase. For example, breathing in “I am calm” and breathing out “I am strong”, and repeating this for a set length of time.

 

Practice these few steps and we guarantee you will begin to notice changes in how you experience the world and yourself.

 

 

 

 

 

The post Mindfulness Instead of Mindlessness appeared first on Live Well Therapy Associates | Narberth, PA.

source https://www.livewellassociates.com/mindfulness-instead-mindlessness/

Managing the Holidays with an Eating Disorder

The holidays are fully upon us, and with them comes a variety of emotions and challenging situations.  Although for some the holidays may bring joy, for many others they are filled with scheduling uncertainty and the possibility of dysfunctional family members.

This is true especially if you’re working on recovery from an eating disorder.  Where a holiday meal is joyous to some, people working on recovery may find the food celebrations encompassed by worry and difficulty.

But amidst this, there are many ways to not only manage the holidays but also ENJOY and flourish throughout the times. Here are our 4 best tips for helping you continue in recovery and enjoy your holiday season.

1- Don’t make it about the food.

Yes, this is a difficult tip. When it seems that everyone and everything is making it about the food it can feel almost impossible to refocus your attention on anything but that. But one of the best things we’ve found to help our clients not hyper-focus on food is immersing themselves in fun, enjoyable activities. Examples would be crafts, decorating, learning a new skill (knitting scarves for family members!), going out for coffee/tea with a family member or friend, or anything else you can think of! Although many people focus on meal times as bonding times during the holidays, see all the different activities and adventures you can have that don’t revolve around food.

2- Do make it about the people you care about.

Relating to tip #1, the holidays don’t have to revolve around food. When we focus our gatherings mainly around food, we lose sight of the people that are really important to us. In recovery, these supports help you keep going and feeling lifted up in the harder times. Carve out focused time to spend with these people. And put a big “no” up for those people who are toxic or harmful to your recovery; one of the best and important self-care strategies is to practice boundaries with those in your life that are harmful to you.

3-Get out strategy.

This tip is about as simple as it sounds, create a plan to exit when needed. Having good boundaries are key to making sure that you are taking care of yourself. If a particular family member is saying things that are inappropriate or triggering it is important to speak up, use your voice, and exit. An exit strategy often times looks like having a friend on speed dial who can help you take a break to talk, or being ready to run a quick errand, or to go outside for a breath of fresh air. It may also look like having an exit strategy simply from a conversation, such as having other topics that you are ready to change the subject to if the conversation is focused on foods or diets.

4- Be kind to yourself.

The most important thing is self-compassion. The holidays can bring a lot of stress and upheaval, and to expect perfection from yourself is too much. So you may struggle, that’s ok. But notice where your negative self-talk is holding you back, challenge it by reminding yourself that you are trying your best and that’s all anyone (especially you!) can ask for.

The holidays can be stressful, but you have the tools to make it a time that’s enjoyable and nourishing!

The post Managing the Holidays with an Eating Disorder appeared first on Live Well Therapy Associates | Narberth, PA.

source https://www.livewellassociates.com/managing-holidays-eating-disorder/